L'amour, sauvegardent le vide
by KaseyRae
Summary: My husband was the quiet type. He never did quite open up to any situation. So when I heard the unfamiliar sobbing on the other end of the phone, I was forced to decide with a choice. I couldn't actually let him suffer like this- but maybe it was good for him to live for a bit. That was for me to decide- and soon. AH/AU. Canon.
1. Chapter 1

**BPOV February 2nd, 2006.**

I remember the day I had met Edward Cullen.

I was with my best friend, Alice. She was talking on and on about her new boyfriend, his twin sister, and his younger brother. They had seemed like a nice family.

_(Flashback, January 31st, 2004.)_

_"Bella, Bella, come on Just one more store!" Alice, my best friend of Seattle, Washington, and I were in the Seattle Mall. Once you got Alice started, you never can get her to stop. It was my mistake for saying yes to her "quick" shopping trip- her idea of a quick shopping journey was, maybe, give or take 5 hours._

_"Really, Alice. I'm done with the shopping, okay? Its not like it won't be here tomorrow." I sighed, kicking my boots together as I tiredly trudged forward to what seemed like the millionth store. Alice scowled at me, before beginning a rant. "You know we have to go to Victoria's Secret before leaving- Jasper asked me to, anyway. Well, maybe not asked, but he mentioned how he liked the brand, you know! And you should try it too! You'd totally love the-" I cut Alice short beofre she could say anymore._

_"Yeesh, take a chill pill Ali. We can go, its fine. But any more stores and I'll slap you, got it? You've tortured me enough today." I replied. Alice smiled brighter than the sun and grabbed my hand. "Well then, we better get going!" But just before she could get a run starting, she stopped dead in her tracks. She reached into her pockey and took out her phone. _

_"Hello?" Alice chirped. She looked like if she got any more happier, she'd burst._

_"Who is it?" I whispered, anxious to know what was going on from the other line. 'Jasper' Alice mouthed. Oh. Great. Maybe I could escape while she was preoccupied. _

_"Okay. Okay. Yeah, I get it. Really? Alright, I'll be right there! Bye!" Alice closed her phone and looked me straight in the eye. "Come with me, we are going to go meet Jasper at the front of the mall." She said, excitement leaking from her voice. _

_We hurried to the front of the store, and then I saw her stop, and run up to a tall, lean man with curly blonde hair and blue eyes. "Jasper, meet Bella. Bella, meet Jasper." she announced. "Its a pleasure to finally meet you." Jasper added, shaking my hand. "You too." I replied. Thats when I noticed that Jasper wasn't alone. A handsome looking man came up next to Jasper and smiled. "Are you ready to go yet, Jaz? Rosalie is on the phone; she wants to know when she can leave." He remarked. I took in a closer look at him. He had tousled bronze hair that looked unkept yet neat at the same time, and jaw-dropping emerald colored eyes. They had specks of hazel, dark green, and gold towards the iris, but the more you looked toward the outer eye, the greener they became._

_"Who's this?" He asked, gesturing to me. Alice stepped forward and took his hand to bring him over. "This is Bella Swan."_

_"I'm Edward Cullen. Its a pleasure to meet you, Bella." He said, flashing a crooked smile towards me. I almost fainted. "Uh.. yeah, you too. Alice, um, told me about you and your family, so, um, yeah..." I stammered. 'Get a brain, Bella! Look like a normal human being! He probably has a girlfriend!' I told myself. _

_Just then, I got a text. The Caller ID read 'Alice'. _

**_I know you like him! Its obvious in your eyes. He thinks you're pretty from the pictures I've shown him. He's just masking that he knows you. I texted him- he's going to share the back seat with you, okay?_**

_Leave it to Alice to mess with my love life. I looked Alice's way and gave a slow nod. She squealed and giggled, running over to Jasper, who looked slightly uncomfortable. I stifled back a laugh. That was too funny._

_"Okay, so Jasper and I are going to be ridding in the front seat... you two don't mind sitting together, right?" She inquired. _

_"No, its fine." Edward said, answering for me. "Right?" He said, looking at me. I had already melted in his eyes and had no chance of being able to speak, so I just nodded and attempted a weak smile._

_We walked through the parking lot and I swear, I couldn't stop looking at Edward. His emerald eyes, his bronze hair, his defined muscles, his perfectness. And he thought I was **pretty**? That was probably just an Alice manipulation._

_"Bella! Bella, we've reached the car, you can turn around and come back to us now." Alice observed, with an obvious smirk on her face. I had been so far into a dreamy state that I missed her bright yellow porsche. Out of all things, why did I have to miss the car? _

_"Uhm, I just... didn't see it." I stammered quickly, avoiding Edward and Jasper's eyes. Though I was a bad liar, maybe they'd just think I was embarrassed. One never knew. Jasper rolled his eyes, and Edward pursed his lips to hold back a laugh. Dammit, they figured it out!_

_I ran back as fast as I could and tried my best to rush into her porsche without tripping, falling, tumbling, or doing a combination of all three. I ducked into the seat and closed the door. I sat there for a good 5 seconds in silence, until I heard a knock coming from the window. It was then that I remembered how Edward was supposed to sit next to me during the 30 minute car ride home. Ah, how wonderful. Heaven right smack in the middle of Hell- I could even form a sentence with him around. But as I opened the door, his warm smile oddly comforted me._

_As it turned out, Edward was much nicer then I thought. I found out that he was 26, he was a new surgeon at the Seattle Hospital, his siblings were Rosalie and Jasper, who were each 29, his favorite color was blue, and he played basketball. I had told him about Charlie and Renee's divorce, that my favorite color was green, I was looking for a job, and I was physically challenged. I left out that I could blush more times than any person on earth, because I thought that that was fairly obvious._

_As we turned into the Cullen's driveway, Edward and I shared a "farewell" glance, and I highly doubted that I'd ever see him again._

_"It was nice talking to you, Bella." Edward said as he stepped out of the car. He walked down his driveway and into his house. I felt my entire body droop with sadness. I was in love with Edward after just meeting him, and he thought I was "pretty" but he probably could have cared less. It was then, as the porsche started up, that I saw a small piece of paper flying around the backseat. I grabbed it, unaware of what was on it. My hands immediately started shaking as I read the perfect, typed-looking script on the scrap of torn graph paper._

_**I had fun talking to you.  
><strong>__**Call me sometime.**_

_**555-3872**_

_**-Edward**_

_****Maybe, possibly, in this twisted universe..._

_Edward was already in love with me too._

* * *

><p><strong>Aww, fluffy one-shot. Don't worry, no more flashbacks after this. Its just a prologue. <strong>

**-Kasey 3**


	2. Chapter 2

I knew I had to get back to work and had to stop thinking about memories. I stepped out of the hospital lounge. I put my earphones in and began listening to Ariana Grande's cover of Rhianna's "Love the Way you lie".

'_On the first page of our story_

_The future seemed so bright_

_Then this thing turned out so evil_

_Don't know why I'm still surprised _

_Even angels have their wicked schemes_

_And you take that to new extremes _

_But you'll always be my hero_

_Even though you've lost your mind'_

I, personally thinking about the day I met Edward. It was three days ago from this date. We hadn't been in "love" until today, when we met in the park, kissed, and realized. I smiled as I thought about this wonderful memory while strolling down the hospital hallway. I sat down at my reception desk.

I was so annoyed from all the papers on my desk. They simply reminded me about how much of a failure I was at arranging things. It was like they were saying, '_Bella can't do anything at all… she can't even tackle paperwork.' _

Maybe about half an hour later, as I was looking down at paperwork- apparently, the doctors needed new equipment for cancer surgery, and I had raised my hand to help look for new kinds- when suddenly two hands blocked me from seeing anything.

"Edward?" I asked. The hands suddenly were off my eyes and were turning around my chair, and suddenly I was in the air. Yep, it was Edward.

Our lips locked immediately. "Hello, Love." His perfect, velvet, voice replied. We stayed that way for a few minutes, until I was breathless. My eyes glazed over as I looked at his breathtaking face, twisted up into a smile now. "Hi…" I managed to say, before going into a trance from his perfect being.

"What have you been up to?" He asked, eyeing the work on my desk. I sighed, and flopped back in my chair, and put my head in my hands. "Nothing, don't even look at this. Please, don't." I answered, my throat suddenly going thick. He would think I was such an idiot for just sitting here, being intimidated by papers, while I could be 'running the hospital'.

He turned my swivel chair around to face him, and took my face in his hands. "If you are worried that I'll see you as a failure, you're wrong." He replied, his eyes smoldering. How on earth did I get so lucky to find him? He read my face like an open book, or as if he could read my mind as well.

"Dr. Cullen, your break is over. Please come down to finish you surgery." An annoyed voice said, coming over the loudspeaker. Edward suddenly turned into a man of no emotion. He always did this to hide sadness, guilt, or annoyance. It was like he had no emotions except for happiness and anger- "I'll… be back later." He said, turning on his heel and walking away. I swallowed. This is what I hated him doing. He masked everything he felt from his parents, his siblings, and me. We constantly fought about it.

_June 2005- flashback_

"_Just stop being such an ass and tell me what's going on!" I screamed at my boyfriend. I had had enough of his 'I don't have any feelings' scheme. "If you don't tell me, I'll end this!" I yelled at him. His bottom lip trembled. Good, I hurt him. _

"_If… you… even… understood…" He said, shaking with anger._

"_Understood WHAT?" I yelled, tired of this._

"_That's I f—-ing can't go against what my father said! I never will, do you understand? If you can't, then you aren't worth my time!" He screamed into my face. _

_I crumpled into nothing from there. I ran out of the room, grabbed my things, and ran out the door. I shut the door to his apartment, and fell against the door, sobbing. But what hurt even more was that I heard nothing. No sound at all. When Edward was terribly upset he stopped talking, moving, or doing anything. Suddenly I felt the door opened slightly. Arms wrapped around me. _

"_I'm sorry, Bella… I didn't mean what I said." Edward said, his voice still low from emotion. It was the closest emotion I ever got. I turned around to face him._

"_I'm sorry too… look, it doesn't matter. Can't you just help me put my stuff back?" I asked, sniffing back tears. He stroked my cheek. "Of course, sweetheart. I'm so sorry." He picked me up in his arms, and brought my bag with him as well. He set me down on the couch inside the living room, and kissed my lips once, before bringing my bag down into his room._

"Excuse me? Hello? Isabella?" Lauren Marolly, my boss, came up to me. "Yes, Lauren? What would you like on this _fine _day?" I snapped.

"Just making sure you're doing your job. Cause you know, I saw you got a little… distracted twice in one hour." She sneered, twirling her blond hair. I scowled.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" I muttered, ignoring her for five seconds, which made her loose interest and walk away.

For the next five hours, I sat at the reception desk. Thank god that there were very few people coming up, but it could of also been from my hostile look to anyone that even came close.

X

As we stepped into Edward's Aston Martin Vanquish, I saw the vulnerability in his eyes. He looked like he thought I was upset. "Hey… I'm not mad at you, baby. Its ok, I know you had to go." I said, trying to keep my voice light. "Yes, you are. Love- I should have postponed that meeting." He said, though we both silently knew that that wasn't what was bothering me.

"Yeah. Okay." I said, denying any comment thinking otherwise in my head.

We went through dinner and watched a movie making useless small talk. He and I knew both knew something had to change.

"Do you want to take a shower with me?" Edward asked suddenly. I looked at him. He was dying to make me feel happy again, so much that he was digging into his romance bag. I shook my head. "Nah, you go alone. I'll take one in the morning." I replied quickly, looking away. He simply nodded and I could swear I saw a small bit of misery flash over his eyes but it was quickly replaced by an empty glance towards me.

I began thinking about times we fought, and times when he slightly broke his perfect masked expression. It killed me to see how rigid and icy he always looked, when really it could be a real expression. I'd never seen or heard him cry ever in his life. Not when his aunt died, or his grandparents. Not even in his sleep. I kind of wished that I could change him into something else.

As I was lying down on our bed, I was completely unaware that Edward had been sitting next to me the entire time. I was awakened out of my stupor from Edward's hand running down my back. I felt rigid myself in that moment. I didn't want him to know that I was thinking something like that, or I would start a fight.

"Bella? Are you all right, love? You seem tense."

"I'm not tense." I retorted. He ran his hand down my back again, massaging it this time. I let out a long sigh. _Dang it, now he knows. _

"Are you sure, sweetheart? Is there something you want to discuss? Edward asked, sweeping my hair back.

"No, its fine… I'm just thinking." I said lamely, hoping that would turn him off. Nope, it didn't go that way… not ever.

"Sweetheart, please… just tell me what's on your mind." Edward complained, faking annoyance. I knew, because I turned around to face him, he was smiling, but it didn't meet his eyes. He really wanted to know, but it wasn't going to come out of me even if he pried.

"Nah, I'm good." I said, tapping the tip of his nose. He growled. He hated when I did that. "But really. I'm fine, Edward, okay?" I said, annoyed that he kept pestering me.

"Well, if you say so." Edward answered, leaning in to kiss me sweetly. It lasted for about 10 seconds before he stopped and fell down against the pillows. The last thing I remembered was falling asleep on his chest.


	3. Chapter 3

April 26, 2006

Today was magic. Epic. Perfect.

Today was my two year anniversary of being "together" with Edward Cullen.

I had thought he had forgotten this morning, for he woke up like nothing was going on at all.

"Morning, love. How was your sleep?" He asked, sweeping my hair back. I grimaced. "Bad, I fell asleep at like, one. Hey, are you forgetting anything?" I asked, giving him a knowing look.

He laughed at my expression. "I doubt it, sweetheart. Come on, lets get up so we aren't late for work." He said sweetly.

X

It wasn't till about 5, when he asked me if I could come off work early. I said probably, if he asked Lauren. Forget it if I asked. If I did, my paycheck would be cut in half.

After about 5 minutes of arguing with Lauren, he finally got her to agree.

We began driving down the road in a rental car that was a convertible. The wind blew our hair back. We suddenly came up to a road that was glowing from a million candles. Lights were hanging from everywhere. "Breathe" by Panamore was playing on the speakers. I looked at him, confused. Hadn't he forgotten? He smiled brightly, not saying a word. He parked the car, stepped out, and opened the door for me.

"What's going-" I began, but I didn't get to finish, for he silenced me with a long, intense kiss.

"Happy Anniversary, Love." He said breathlessly when he pulled away. "Happy Anniversary." I responded, unable to come out with anything else.

We spent the rest of that night having dinner, exchanging gifts, kissing, and watching romantic movies. Though I doubt we remembered the plots of the movies, for we were so intensified by the others presence.

At the end of the night, just before falling asleep, Edward read me a poem that he had wrote. He read in French, then English.

"_Amour, quand je tombe, vous m'attrapent."_

"_Love, when I fall, you catch me._

"_Amour, quand je tombe, vous m'attrapent."_

"_Love, when I fail, you save me."_

"_Ainsi quand je suis creux"_

"_Thus, when I am hollow"_

"_L'amour, sauvegardent le vide."_

"_Love, save the empty."_

"That… that was beautiful, Edward," I began, tears forming in my eyes. "I love you."

"As I do you, my love." He replied, wiping away a single tear on my face. I fell asleep repeating the words in my head.

_Amour, quand je tombe, vous m'attrapent._

_Amour, quand je tombe, vous m'attrapent._

_Ainsi quand je suis creux_

_L'amour, sauvegardent le vide._

It was then that dreamless sleep took over me.

**Fluff, fluff, and more fluff.**

**Xoxo, Kasey**


	4. Chapter 4

Two months later (June, 2006.)

We were sitting on the couch having a normal, decent conversation. Or what was normal for us. Ha. We normally went so deep into each other, that I swore that if someone recorded it & put it on youtube, we'd get a million views from the love that poured out of every conversation we had. Well… almost. And that's what happened tonight.

"I wish that we never had to die. I wish I could be with you forever." I said, snuggling deep into his chest.

He smiled a breathtakingly beautiful smile. "I wish that too, love." He answered, kissing my forehead. We stayed like that for a while. He rubbed my back, and I kissed his neck. It was so sweet, the passion we silently shared.

"I just wish we could let everything out. You know, iron out the kinks of our relationship. So we never had to deal with anything annoying again." I said, hoping he would understand. Yeah, I wish I could be so lucky.

He very suddenly pulled back, looking me in the eye. "What… do you mean by that?" He asked, biting on his lip and then quickly replacing it with a phlegmatic yet icy stare. That was when I snapped. I had had enough of his antics of 'never showing anything'. In fact, I was done! He was going to have to deal with it! I knew fights with him got ugly, but this was the first time in my life that I no longer cared.

"That! That is what's breaking us apart!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, standing up and pointing at his eyes. His fists clenched, and his eyes narrowed. "STOP TRYING TO HIDE YOURSELF!" I yelled even louder.

He stood up himself, being almost a foot taller than I was. "Don't. Tell. Me. How. To. Act." He said slowly but dreadfully, pronouncing each syllable. I knew I had two choices now. Option One seemed easier. I could run to him, wrap my arms around his chest, and beg for forgiveness. Option Two was different. I could continue this fight, and possibly end winning- but losing him.

I chose option two.

"Then stop hiding from me." I came back, my voice shaking with emotion. My hands became claws. I felt like tearing the apartment apart.

His sister Alice suddenly came into his home. "Hey guys! I was just… oh god…" She barely finished her sentence. Obviously, the hostile looks we were giving each other had to be doing _something _to the atmosphere.

"Well, all the better with your sister here to back me up!" I snapped at Edward, getting a reaction out of him- anger.

"Bella. Stop. NOW!" He screamed, shaking with anger.

"Try to stop me! Cry! Plead! Beg on your knee's! It's the only thing that can save you now!" I yelled. For emphasis, I grabbed the nearest empty glass and threw it to the floor. It shattered on the floor. Edward grabbed a pillow from the couch and threw it at my face.

"You…I.." He growled. "Just…Shut the hell up and-" he was interrupted by Emmett, Rosalie, Carlisle, Esme, and Jasper walking in. Apparently we were scheduled to go to a movie. "Bella, can we save this for after the movie?" Edward almost pleaded.

"I'm afraid the movie has to wait!" I retorted.

"Bella, you are wasting my families time and I dislike that! Stop, right now!" Edward yelled at me, throwing his hands up into the air.

It was tug-a-war, and currently? I was winning.

"No. YOU need to learn something." I said angrily. I stepped forward toward him and pushed him back. "Wake up! Learn!" I screamed.

Carlisle stepped forward, and tried to intervene. "Bella, Edward, please. It's all right, calm down…" He said, swallowing hard. He put two hands in between us.

That only stepped my anger up. "Don't you DARE tell me what to do! Sure, it's Edward's fault he won't quit it, but its MAINLY your fault because YOU told him to be this! You told him to stay strong! YOU told him to be this man right now! Its mainly because of YOU that I'm leaving him! So you can thank him when I leave this house, Edward! And Carlisle, you can thank your son for keeping his mask on so long that he drove away his GIRLFRIEND!" I bellowed, using al my mind.

I blinked back tears, and ran into Edward's bathroom. I gathered up my toothbrush, hairbrush, and other toiletries. I stuffed them into a small bag.

"Bella! Don't do this!" Pleased Alice, as she saw me. "It… it's not going to end well!" she cried. "I'm sorry, but I have to teach him this." I said sadly. I wiped away a tear forming in my eye.

I ran into his bedroom and grabbed all my clothes, stuffing them into a suitcase. Tears were forming in my eyes time after time. I wiped them away thoroughly one last time and ran out of my bedroom, coming face-to-face with Edward.

"That's IT!" I yelled, too angry to cry. "We are OVER!" I yelled, and I ran out the door. The last thing I saw before closing it was Edward standing as still as a statue, his mouth wide open and his eyes glazed over. That was when the tears came, and it became to blurry to see. I went down 5 floors to my own apartment, ran inside, and shut the door. That entire experience had not only ruined US, but it had ruined ME.

I could barely function, period. I no longer had my stable source. I no longer had Edward. But that wasn't what had hurt the most. What had almost killed me and shot me dead was the fact that Edward was probably in his room, not even caring. Or at least looking like it. In fact, I would have bet anyone that he was currently sitting in his room, almost lifeless.

I fell back onto my bed, tears still rolling down my face. _'If only he would just show me that he can feel!'_

That was when I remembered the line that Edward had said to me on our anniversary. It was in French, but I still could remember the English translation.

"L'amour, sauvegardent le vide."

"_Love, save the empty."_

I was supposed to save his empty soul, and I had failed to do that. I had failed me, and us. His family. Everyone. But most of all, I had failed him.

That was what I had truly sickened me.

My phone rang at 2AM. I was too depressed to answer it. I looked at the voicemail instead.

"**Bella, its Alice. Look. I know you won't even talk right now, because its too early. I just woke up from this. You need to get on the phone as soon as you get this message. Just… call me or something. You know my number in your head. Please…"**

I heard faint crying in the background. Either it was loud wailing that had picked up, or Alice was upset for me ignoring her. It was probably Alice.

However, something ached in my body. Who was that wailer? It sounded so… foreign… strange. But I knew it was Alice, and I told myself not to worry, and to fall asleep.

X

Two days had passed and I was a mess. Yeah, I ate, showered, and answered messages from my parents, but that was my limit.

That was when Alice Cullen called me. Dammit, and I needed to talk anyone but her.

I picked up anyway.

"Hello…?" I said carefully.

"Bella? Its Alice. Look, I'm sorry for calling over and over, but there is something I think you should know." She said quickly.

Wait a second. What?

**Evil ending, I know! **

**Don't hate Bella, okay? She needed Edward to learn something. Besides. It will get more fluffy in the next chapter, Promise.**

**Xoxo, Kasey**


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It all belongs to SM.

* * *

><p>I'm sorry, guys! I totally forgot about updating, and I took the SATs, and school is getting harder, etc. I'm so lame for not updating, I apologize! Please forgive me, and enjoy this little chapter. This is going to get <em>very <em>dramatic, I warn you! Have fun! Please review and tell me what you'd like to see happen. Thanks, everyone! Please tell your friends about my stories, if you can. I love your suggestions, so feel free to send me a message.

Thanks again,  
>~KaseyRae<p>

* * *

><p>I hung up the phone before she could answer. How <em>dare <em>she shock me like that? I tried hard to not give a damn about what anyone was crying about. It was probably Esme sobbing or something. _That's right, Bella._ I told myself. _Keep this up, and you'll be over him in no time. _What was I kidding myself? The man himself was a robot. He only carried two emotions in his pocket; excited and emotionless. I could do without.

Alice called back immediately. I grabbed my iPhone off of the counter and immediately pressed the red "decline". She went straight to voicemail. She then tried my house, to which I picked up the phone and then put it back into it's charger. She wouldn't get through to me, even if she wanted to. This endless drabble would end within minutes. Perhaps we'd never even see eachother again! That would be great- a clean, fresh start.

If that wasn't enough, now I was getting text messages. Emails. Skype Requests. I was good, but Alice was better. It was easy to hit no the first few times, but sooner or later, she knew I'd cave into her devices. She sent me a last resort, a FaceTime.

I decided to finally press "accept". Alice's angular face showed up through the pixilated screen. "Bella," She said anxiously. "Listen to me." The wailing continued in the background.

"The person who's crying in the background…" She whispered the last part, her voice cracking at the end. The world started to spin, as I faced the inevitable, the epiphany.

I couldn't hear the truth, even as loud as it rang through my head, pounding in my ears. _His _name. _His _resolution. _His _breaking, and yet _my _breakthrough. His love meant everything to me- everything- and here I was debating on whether or not I would listen to his sister's fruitless pleas.

The one side of me bickered in an effortless attempt to listen. She knew that in reality, it would only benefit the relationship I had- or once had. The other side knew better. It wanted, and forced my hand towards the red "hang up" button. No, I couldn't. But what other, better thing to do then this? I couldn't think of a better solution. Leave him to his own devices, let him get another girl, and let me move on. I held the key to my own future, and yet somehow I didn't feel like I deserved it, or that I even wanted it.

"It's… Edward."

But, at that moment, my ears opened, my hands froze, my knees buckled. No sound came out of my throat but a strangled cry. A single, stranded, salty tear erupted from beneath the surface of my tear ducts; my lips mashed themselves together, and my tongue ran itself over my lips. My eyes closed, and I took in a deep breath.

"Tell me what you want me to say." I finally managed, the seconds feeling like hours. My entire body began to sweat. I knew this feeling; it was the incoming of a minor panic attack.

"That you'll come." She said softly.

That was all it took for me to raise of the floor in the heat, in the moment. I could feel the blood coursing through my veins; feel the rush in my hand, the numbness in my feet. I was on fire, and I couldn't stop. I ran faster then I had ever in my entire life, running for him, running for me, but mostly running for us.


End file.
